" Not all who wander are lost."

10.31.2010

Day 12

First off, hope you all have a safe and happy Halloween. Tinkerbell, Jason, and I will be celebrating family style tonight. Maybe I'll post a picture on here, just for the sake of cuteness ;)

Something you never get compliments on....

OK, please don't consider this "fishing for compliments." It was on the list and I am going to answer honestly.

I never get compliments on my appearance. Like ever. Not even from my parents when I was younger. I know my mom was trying to support my inner beauty, and appreciate that, but a "you look beautiful" once in a while would've been good. Not even on my WEDDING DAY! I remember one time a couple of years ago and older adult friend saw me dressed up at a party and responded with, "you know, you do actually have a pretty face..." Um, Ouch! Why say anything at all? I am not living my life so that I can be viewed as "pretty" (see day 8), but being told I am does still feel pretty good. Especially when I have made a great effort.

I do get compliments like: I love your haircut, outfit, necklace, etc... Every now and then it'd be nice to hear that I have beautiful eyes, smile, face, body, skin... You know, something I didn't buy at a store.

Even Jason is slow to compliment my looks. He'll likely be mad that I am posting this part, but I am being honest. It does hurt my feelings. He isn't mean to me, please don't think I'm saying that. Don't get me wrong, there are lots of things he does compliment me on, my appearance just isn't one of them. Sometimes a good compliment goes a long way in boosting my self esteem. Me feeling beautiful can lead to more, well, married interaction :) Plus, he is really the only male opinion I am concerned with regarding my looks. I really want him to be happy with his decision of wife in all aspects. He'll be looking at me for the rest of his/ my life after all :)

I guess people just don't know how to deal with my level of beauty. I am not a sickly magazine model, I am a real woman and happy to be so.

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